Phoebe Buffay is one of the central characters from Friends, played by Lisa Kudrow in her most well-known role. The iconic sitcom recently celebrated its 25th anniversary, which was celebrated all over the world. Even Google got in on the action with fun Friends-themed Easter eggs that you could find when you searched for the characters.
Every one of the friends is memorable in their own way. Phoebe is the quirky oddball character who you just can’t help but love. She’s an animal lover, totally confident and completely honest, and does what she can to help her friends at all costs. As the most free-spirited character of the group, Phoebe also has the most interesting backstory. She comes from a troubled background and is known for her signature not-so-smooth guitar playing. It’s this fascinating story that makes her one of the most well-loved characters in the group. But there are a few things about her fans have always wondered, and we’re here to give you those answers.
HOW DOES SHE AFFORD HER APARTMENT?
Of course, it’s not realistic for any of the main characters to afford the large Manhattan apartments they live in. So this question could be applied to any one of them. But Phoebe in particular doesn’t have a steady career. She’s a massage therapist, but for a long time, she doesn’t work in a clinic and just freelances on her own.
At first Phoebe lives with Monica, but eventually moves into her grandmother’s apartment. It’s likely that her grandmother had left her the place with some payments already made. But at one point Phoebe claims to have another roommate named Denise (who was never shown onscreen and may have never existed). Massage therapy in New York City likely pays more than we’d assume, and it’s possible that Phoebe is actually exaggerating her financial situation to either gain sympathy.
JUST HOW EXACTLY DID SHE SURVIVE LIVING ON THE STREETS?
Throughout Friends, we learn bits and pieces of Phoebe’s childhood, listening to her tales of living on the streets and her dysfunctional parentage. But how did she get off the streets and into an apartment? Furthermore, how does someone who breaks up with a boyfriend because he shot a bird survive the violence that she claims to have experienced? Given the fact that Phoebe is not the most intelligent person around, it’s hard to believe she survived on her wits. She has moments where she is extremely naive, such as when she finds out Santa isn’t real. Naivety is not a helpful quality when you’re living on the streets. It’s also probable that some of these stories were lies or exaggerations. You can also assume she may have had help along the way.
WHY WAS SHE SO WELL-ADJUSTED AFTER EVERYTHING SHE WENT THROUGH?
For the most part, Phoebe is happy-go-lucky throughout the show. But in reality, after going through the horrifying experiences she did, she would have probably suffered from some type of PTSD or adjustment and mental health issues. We never see her acknowledging the realities of this situation. Of course, Phoebe probably still did experience this, but the whole point of Friends was to be a funny sitcom. This would likely have taken away from the nature of it all. There are some moments where you can see this trauma coming out, like when she has trust issues in her relationships.
HOW WAS SHE ABLE TO BECOME A MASSAGE THERAPIST?
So Phoebe lived her entire childhood and teen years on the streets. She would have had to go back and get an education, get her G.E.D., and then go through massage therapy certification. That costs money that she wouldn’t have had, and would have taken a long time given how much schooling she missed. On multiple occasions, Phoebe tells the others that she survived by mugging people, so maybe she managed to save up enough money this way to push through.
WHAT HAPPENED TO HER BIOLOGICAL MOM?
In Season 3, Phoebe meets her biological mother, Phoebe Abbott. The two decide to form a bond over a few episodes, and Phoebe calls her for advice when she decides to be a surrogate for her brother. However, Phoebe Abbott seems to disappear and is never seen again after Season 4. She doesn’t come to Phoebe’s wedding, either. There are a few times Phoebe Abbott is mentioned, but you’d think that Phoebe would want to keep this connection, given that she had gone without parents for so long. However, the fact of the matter could be that Phoebe is now an adult and doesn’t really feel she needs a mother. It could have also been that it became too difficult for the two ladies to keep in contact. The real truth is probably that the showrunners didn’t want to continue with this storyline once these issues were resolved.
HOW DID SHE BECOME SEPARATED FROM URSULA?
The story goes that after their mother’s death, Phoebe was separated from her twin sister, Ursula. While Ursula went into the foster care system, Phoebe ended up on the streets. Throughout the show, the two have a strained relationship. The real question is this: why would one twin sister end up in foster care while the other ends up on the streets? In real life, the system would have taken both of them. But it appears there was some type of loophole that allowed this to happen, and Phoebe went under the radar. There’s also a possibility that Ursula selfishly allowed Phoebe to slip through the cracks so she could have a better life for herself. It’s pretty obvious why Phoebe wants nothing to do with her “evil twin.” Ursula got the better end of the stick and still has a terrible personality.
WHY DID SHE AGREE TO BE A SURROGATE FOR HER BROTHER?
Many people didn’t really like the whole surrogate storyline for Phoebe. The whole thing was just weird. Why would Phoebe have chosen to do this, especially since she didn’t even really completely approve of her brother’s relationship? It’s a major commitment to go through for a brother you’ve only recently met and gotten to know. However, the real explanation comes from behind the scenes — Kudrow became pregnant, so the producers decided to write in a storyline to explain her growing belly.
WHEN DAVID MOVED TO MINSK, WHY DIDN’T SHE JUST GO WITH HIM?
During the first season, Phoebe dates David, a scientist whom she is madly in love with. When David finds out he is getting a research grant and has to move to Minsk, Phoebe is crushed. The reality is that, given Phoebe’s lack of career stability, non-existent family, and free-spirited bohemian nature, she could have just moved there with him. But this question never even came up. It seems as though Phoebe was satisfied with her life in New York City and didn’t want to move to a foreign country, so it might have been a non-starter.
HOW DID SHE END UP IN THE FRIEND GROUP?
We get a pretty clear explanation from each character about how they all end up being friends. But Phoebe’s story is never really explained. The lone answer is that she answered Monica’s newspaper ad looking for a roommate. But the reason they become such good friends and how Phoebe got integrated into the whole circle is still kind of questionable. Their personalities just don’t seem like they would mesh in that way, and just where did Phoebe come from, anyway?
WHY DIDN’T SHE END UP WITH JOEY?
Out of the six friends, Joey and Phoebe are the only two who don’t end up in relationships within the core group. Chandler and Monica get married, and there’s the Ross and Rachel saga. So you’d think that Phoebe would gravitate to Joey, especially since they are seemingly intellectual equals. They also seem to have the most in common. The reality is that they both probably want different things. Phoebe ends up finding her future husband, while Joey is still single by the end of the series. Not every friend has to be together.
